Xtra Magazine Video: Does Gay Porn Influence Gay Men To Bareback & Practice Unsafe Sex?
I believe this discussion is very important and I think barebacking does indeed influence gay men. In society, there are very few positive representations of gay male sexuality at all. Some gay porn stars probably practice unsafe sex because they believe it can give them a career boost. But is it worth it, to risk one’s health just to make more money? Most gay porn studios do not allow barebacking it is a niche market.
Another point to consider is, there are very few places in society where male homosexuality is allowed to be shown in a sexual manner. Sure, there are television shows with gay characters such as Glee, Modern Family, and the New Normal on mainstream television. However, these gay male characters are rarely sexual they aren’t allowed to express their sexual desires like heterosexual characters.
Gay porn is one of the places where gay men can actually see other men being sexual with each other kissing, touching, and yes fucking one another.
Gay porn is fantasy, and I believe for some gay men it is a safe place where gay men we can see male homosexuality expressed visually on our computer screen. The lines become blurred though for some gay men, when they see the gay porn stars not practicing safer sex they believe they don’t have to use condoms as well. I also think for the models in gay porn it is just common sense that they should be practicing safer sex given their profession. It is true that in heterosexual porn condoms are rarely used and I can see the other side of the argument about the double standard.
I still believe though since HIV & AIDS is a serious issue in the gay male community that gay porn films should set an example and the models should be using condoms in gay porn films.
Gay Male Hockey Player storyline: Lari Is Attacked By His Peers Because He Is Gay.
Today’s clip is from a soap opera from Finland called Secret Lives, the big storyline is about a gay male hockey player Lari. Lari has broken up with his boyfriend Elias because he is scared. Photos of Elias and Lari kissing were plastered across the school and now Lari’s secret is out. Lari is conflicted about being gay and he worries that his dreams of becoming a NHL player are over. However, Elias talks to Janne a good friend of Lari and convinces him to talk to the other boys on the hockey team. Unfortunately, Lari is gay bashed by the other boys because he is gay.
Controversial Homophobic Rap Track: Lord Jamar Calls Kanye West A Fag Because He Wore a Skirt.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v5XvjYcVY6Y
This song by Brand Nubian’s Lord Jamar is disappointing, how does it hurt him that Kanye West wore a skirt?
Lord Jamar’s homophobia only proves how some heterosexual black men oppress other black men by trying to police our bodies and sexuality.
Big deal, Kanye West wore a skirt the world didn’t end, nobody died, this song is ludicrous.
Days Of Our Lives Gay Scene: Will & Sonny In Bed Together But Their Relationship Is Lacking Passion.
On numerous internet websites, some fans of the Will & Sonny gay storyline on the NBC soap Days of Our Lives are disappointed about the lack of passion. The problem is clearly the writing, which is disconcerting. Days of Our Lives, is the only American soap opera with a decent gay male storyline. On the ABC soap General Hospital just created a new gay male character Felix but he’s a flamboyant, cardboard cut out stereotype of a gay man.
Some fans have complained that the actors Freddie Smith and Chandler Massey lack chemistry. Most of the blame is placed on Chandler Massey some fans believe he just isn’t comfortable kissing another man. Chandler Massey appears awkward, nervous,and uncertain sometimes with his acting when he is kissing Freddie Smith. I don’t know if this has to do with the fact Massey is heterosexual in real life? Maybe Massey is self conscious about kissing Smith and there are deeper more underlining issues he has with playing a gay male character? Smith is also heterosexual in real life but he seems more natural and comfortable playing a gay male character.
But since Massey is an actor shouldn’t he be giving 100% in his performance when his character is a gay male? I think Massey and Smith have chemistry but the culprit is the writing isn’t giving the actors the freedom to explore their characters sexuality.
In some scenes recently, Will & Sonny come across as best friends, not boyfriends, and definitely not as lovers in a serious romantic relationship.
Will and Sonny’s gay romance comes off as too chaste, too safe, too restrained. There seems to be this tension which is obvious, that the Days of Our Lives executive producer Greg Meng and his writers are fearful of upsetting the heterosexual audience. Why bother creating gay male characters if they are just going to be shadow puppets? What is the point? It is almost the year 2013, if people can’t handle seeing two men in bed together, or making out then they need to get a life or change the channel.
In this clip, it is nice to see Will & Sonny in bed together like any other couple. However, the kissing isn’t that great in this scene the actors Freddie Smith and Chandler Massey’s lips are closed. Closed mouth kissing is pathetic because it isn’t passionate. One of the theories floating around on the internet is, since Days of Our Lives core audience tends to be older people the homosexual romance is being watered down. I agree with this theory because, when I compare Will & Sonny’s relationship to the heterosexual characters there is clearly a double standard.
Another point to consider is, since Will is keeping a secret from Sonny about the paternity of his unborn child this is the reason he’s distant from his boyfriend. I hate the baby storyline, and I think it was a terrible decision by the writers to create it because it sends mixed messages to the audience. I am cognizant that on soaps there needs to be conflict and angst but I feel this particular storyline is boring. I notice other soaps such as the British soap Hollyoaks also has a baby storyline for a gay male character. I understand gay people have children just like heterosexuals but these baby storylines are boring. I am also concerned that once Will’s baby is born, the gay romance is going to be destroyed.
The reason passion in a relationship is important is, how can the audience truly root for Will & Sonny when the writing is restraining the characters simply because they are gay men? How can the audience believe Will & Sonny are truly in love with each other when the writing doesn’t allow it? Why should the audience care about Will & Sonny when they aren’t allowed to truly be equal to the heterosexual characters on the show?
German Interview Der Spiegel: Orlando Cruz Talks About His Struggles As A Gay Man In The Macho Sport Of Boxing.
SPIEGEL Interview with Orlando Cruz’Something Had to Change’
SPIEGEL: Mr. Cruz, is it important as a boxer to conform to the image of a tough man?
ANZEIGE
Cruz: Boxing is a sport that is largely dominated by machos, by men who think we have to conform to a very specific role model. The ideal boxer doesn’t think too much, is raw and brimming with strength. I am also fascinated by strength, but for me style is a part of that.
SPIEGEL: At the beginning of October, you announced that you were gay. Then two weeks ago in Florida, you climbed into the ring for the first time since you came out. How did your fans and your opponent react?
Cruz: I had the feeling that the spectators accepted me. They kept calling out my name, much louder than during my earlier fights. My opponent, the Mexican Jorge Pazos, had said beforehand that what I did outside the ring was none of his business. I think that is the right attitude.
SPIEGEL: Once, when Pazos missed you, you shrugged your shoulders. Another time, you beat your chest wildly with your fists.
Cruz: Those gestures were my way of saying: “This is my ring, my moment. No one is going to take this away from me.” My body language was also important because I wanted to prove to people that I am not a girl in the ring. I am a man in every sense of the word. That is how I want the spectators to see me.
SPIEGEL: So you do have to fulfill a few clichés about boxers?
Cruz: No, but being a bit macho is part of the game in the ring.
SPIEGEL: You have been a professional boxer for twelve years. Why did you come out at this particular point in time?
Cruz: I have earned myself respect as an athlete. I have only lost 2 out of 22 professional fights. I knocked out some of my opponents in the first round. But I never really received respect as a person. That’s something I had come to realize over the past few years. The end of my boxing career is no longer that far off, and it was time for me to make peace with myself. And there was a second reason for me to come out: I hoped it would make me a better boxer.
SPIEGEL: How do you mean?
Cruz: Until now, I have kept my personal life and my career strictly separate from each other. No one was supposed to know that I’m gay. This game of hide-and-seek was incredibly strenuous and it took a lot of energy out of me. Now I’m hoping that I can put that energy into my training.
SPIEGEL: Did you fall in love when you were a teenager?
Cruz: And how.
SPIEGEL: With a girl or a boy?
Cruz: With a girl, she was the great love of my youth. We split up when we were seventeen. She was the person who gave me my first kiss.
SPIEGEL: When did you realize that you were gay?
Cruz: I was 19 years old. I was boxing at the Sydney Olympic Games in 2000. I met a man there. And when I got home, I sensed that something in me had changed.
SPIEGEL: How did you feel about that?
Cruz: Awful, I was in a very bad state.
SPIEGEL: Why?
Cruz: Because I wasn’t prepared for it. For a long time I didn’t want to accept that I was gay. Better said: I couldn’t accept it because I was too afraid. Homosexuals were discriminated against in Puerto Rico back then, sometimes even killed. I had a friend named José, but we called him Linoshka because he was a transvestite. He was stabbed to death in the street at the age of 19 by a homophobe because he had taken part in a gay-pride parade.
SPIEGEL: How did you handle it all?
Cruz: It was a painful path, but I was lucky in that my mother gave me her support. One year after the Olympics, I explained to my parents that I was gay. My mother told me she didn’t care, and that she loved me. After that, we both cried for joy.
SPIEGEL: And your father?
Cruz: That was more difficult. He was never as sympathetic as my mother. In the meantime, my parents have separated. During my fight two weeks ago, my mother was sitting right next to the ring; my father was up in the stands. But I was happy that he was there at all.
SPIEGEL: For 12 years, you tried to keep your homosexuality secret. How did you do that?
Cruz: I acted a part. I sensed the suspicion. When other guys talked about a woman’s backside, they’d pay close attention to see whether I joined in. So I played along: “Yeah, yeah, great ass.” But inside me there was only emptiness; that wasn’t me. Each time, I was denying my own self.
SPIEGEL: How did that feel?
Cruz: I had bad thoughts about myself because I wasn’t being true to myself. Inside there was emptiness, and it felt as though I was being weighed down by five tons.
SPIEGEL: Were there people in the boxing scene who knew the truth?
Cruz: That’s inevitable. Óscar de la Hoya, my former promoter, once asked me quite openly before a fight: “Orlando, tell me, are you going to tell people that you are gay?” There were other people standing around us too, boxers, managers. I was shocked and said: “No, I’m a man.”
SPIEGEL: Did people put you down?
Cruz: Four years ago, I was fighting for the world championship title in Puerto Rico. The spectators bad-mouthed me; they called me a faggot. They told my opponent to pluck my feathers. In Puerto Rico, when you talk disparagingly about a gay man, you call him a duck. That’s when I realized that something had to change.
SPIEGEL: That was the key moment for you?
Cruz: Exactly. In 2008, I moved from Puerto Rico to New Jersey. The distance did me good, also because I was able to prepare myself at leisure for my coming out.
SPIEGEL: How did you prepare yourself for it?
Cruz: First of all, I was forced recognize that I could not manage it alone. Three years ago, I went and got help from a psychologist, and we met every two weeks. He helped me to work out whether I really wanted to come out for my own sake, or whether I was being pushed into doing it. Only once it was clear to me that this was my most deep-seated wish was I was able to go through with it. Six months ago in New York, I met with the founder of an organization that fights for gay and lesbian rights. He helped me with the media relations work. He gave me tips for my press release, and we set up a Twitter profile especially for my coming out, which I now post to in English and Spanish.
SPIEGEL: Was your boxing team initiated into your plans?
Cruz: Of course. My promoter Tuto Zabala was very cautious at first. He asked all the important contacts whether anyone had problems with a gay boxer. He went to the television network Telemundo, which broadcasts all my fights in the US, and he talked to the boxing organisation WBO. They all indicated that my coming out was fine by them.
SPIEGEL: Were you nevertheless frightened?
Cruz: The preparations dispelled my fears, but I really was nervous and worried about what the reactions would be. I was prepared for a lot of nasty comments. But after I came out most people were happy for me. Professionals like world champion Miguel Cotto stood by me; he congratulated me. Ninety-five percent of the reactions were positive.
SPIEGEL: And the remaining five percent?
Cruz: The other day I was training at a boxing gym in Puerto Rico, and a group of boxers were standing next to me. They were talking about me and I could hear everything. One of them said to his pals: “Hey, we’d better not take a shower before going home today.” That’s totally ignorant. I’m a professional, an athlete. I go to the gym every day and I train hard. I don’t go there to watch anyone in the shower.
SPIEGEL: Did you confront them?
Cruz: No. In the old days that would have made me angry. But now that I’ve come out, everyone knows the truth. That’s like a protective shield against comments like that. Stupid remarks and jokes no longer hurt me, because I can stand by being gay. Nowadays I can even laugh at jokes about gays. Now I feel free, hungry and strong.
SPIEGEL: Have people outside the world of boxing also been in touch with you?
Cruz: Loads of them. There are messages from Venezuela, Poland and Australia in my mailbox. Even from Afghanistan. Many of the men who write to me have fallen in love with another man and don’t know how to explain this to their families. I can offer advice because I know what it’s like.
SPIEGEL: Do you know other professional athletes who are gay?
Cruz: If I did, I certainly wouldn’t mention their names. But there are definitely many more homosexuals in sports than we think.
SPIEGEL: News of your coming out spread incredibly quickly. Were you expecting that?
Cruz: Even though I tried to be prepared for everything, it was more than I could cope with. Suddenly I was sitting on US morning TV shows. Producers were asking me whether I would be interested in a reality show about myself. I received offers to take part in a TV celebrity dancing show. Even my mother was interviewed by journalists.
SPIEGEL: Why did your coming out attract so much attention?
Cruz: It’s not just because I’m a professional athlete. It is very unusual for someone from Latin American society to openly stand by his homosexuality. In my hometown, there are still lots of prejudices against gays. We are often not considered to be fully-fledged people. The family is sacred there; having children means more than anything else.
SPIEGEL: Englishman Justin Fashanu was the first and so far only professional football player to reveal that he was gay. After coming out in 1990, he constantly felt discriminated against, and later committed suicide.
Cruz: Of course, there are still some tough days ahead for me. But I have built myself such a strong network that I can be sure of always receiving support. Some 15 or 20 years ago it would not have been possible for me to come out. Back then, people still had such narrow views, but today many of them are more liberal. Being gay is no longer a taboo in many parts of society. That has affected sports, even boxing.
SPIEGEL: Since your victory against Jorge Pazos you have been considered a candidate to fight for the World Boxing Organization title. You could become the world champion.
Cruz: Yes. But I don’t want to be seen only as a boxer who is gay. I want to be a boxer who is professional, who pursues his goals and realizes his dreams. And my biggest dream is the world championship belt.
SPIEGEL: Did you have many female admirers before coming out?
Cruz: Oh yes, I got lots of offers. The girls would come around after my fights wanting to flirt. They’d say: “Hey, you’re so cute, come on Orlando.”
SPIEGEL: What did you answer?
Cruz: Well, what do you think? I said: “Sorry, not with me. That doesn’t work on me.” I think there are a few girls who will be sad after my coming out. I’m almost a bit sorry about that.
SPIEGEL: Your last opponent had no problem with your homosexuality. What will you do if your next adversary is less tolerant?
Cruz: Oh, you know, there will be people like that, I’m sure. Someone will come along who calls me a faggot or a fairy. I’ll say: “What? You call me a faggot? Okay, if you like. But you’d better watch out, because I’m the faggot who’s going to kick your ass.”
SPIEGEL: Mr. Cruz, thank you for this interview.
Interview conducted by Lucas Eberle.
Days Of Our Lives Preview To Monday: Will & Sonny’s Gay Romance Goes To Next Level They Make Out Passionately On A Bed!!!
Finally, it took almost a year but the Days of our lives writers and NBC got it right with the gay storyline! For months fans have complained that Will and Sonny’s gay romance lacks passion.
On the October 26th 2012 episode, Will and Sonny relationships advanced to the next level. I commend Freddie Smith and Chander Massey for giving 110% in the make out scene. The kisses were powerful, passionate, full of lust and desire.
Freddie and Chandler are hot and it was so sexy that I felt like a voyeur watching them make out!
UK Telegraph Article: Orlando Cruz Breaks Barrier Is The World’s First Openly Gay Male Professional Boxer!!!
The world of sport has become a little more colourful now that the 31-year-old Puerto Rican boxer Orlando Cruz, currently ranked fourth-best featherweight in the world, has given a statement to the Boxing Scene website openly declaring that he is gay.
“As I continue my ascendant career, I want to be true to myself,” he wrote. “I want to try to be the best role model I can be for kids who might look into boxing as a sport and a professional career. I have and will always be a proud Puerto Rican. I have always been and always will be proud gay men.”
Cruz himself, however, has precious few role models. Traditionally, there has been a tendency for gay sportspeople to hide their sexual orientation until they retire. Justin Fashanu, the only English footballer to openly declare his homosexuality, was disowned by his brother John Fashanu and subjected to a great deal of homophobic abuse; he took his own life in 1998.
Emilie Griffith, a welterweight in the 1960s who was the first boxer from the US Virgin Islands ever to become a world champion, is another tragic figure. He managed to keep his bisexuality largely hidden from the public despite being seen by Alan Hubbard, a sports writer, “passionately kissing one of his cornermen”.
In 1962, Benny Paret, a Cuban boxer, threw homophobic insults at Griffiths during the weigh-in. Griffiths was restrained, but in the subsequent fight he responded with such a devastating chain of blows that Paret was knocked unconscious. Griffiths continued to attack while the Cuban was propped against the ropes, and Paret died of his injuries 10 days later. Griffiths suffered from guilt throughout his life, but was also haunted by the bitter irony that underpinned the episode. “I kill a man and most people forgive me,” he said. “However, I love a man and many say this… makes me an evil person. So, even though I never went to jail, I have been in prison most of my life.”
In 1992, Griffith was beaten almost to death in New York after leaving a gay bar near the Port Authority Bus Terminal in an attack that was thought to be motivated by homophobia. He currently received full-time care and has been diagnosed with pugilistic dementia.
But for all the dark tales from the past, times have changed. Cruz’s announcement has not provoked the same degree of shock that it might have done in previous decades, and his career is not in any danger. Nevertheless, he will doubtless be the victim of a degree of abuse, and is clearly brave to have put his head above the parapet. Orlando Cruz is poised to become a symbolic figure among gay sportspeople, whether they are out of the closet or not.
Huffington Post Article: ‘Gaycism’ and The New Normal: The ‘Hot’ Trend on TV Is Bigotry!!!
Nico Lang
Co-Creator and Co-Editor, In Our Words
In recent months, there’s been a lot of chatter on the interwebs about this thing called “gaycism” on the TV. As defined by Lauren Bans of GQ, gaycism is “the wrongheaded idea that having gay characters gives you carte blanche to cut PC corners elsewhere.” In her example, Bans cites shows like Modern Familyand freshman comedy Partners as emblematic of this trend. Modern Family is an Emmy-juggernaut, a critical darling and a much-lauded champion of LGBT characterization on TV, but that progressivism comes at the expense of Gloria, the lone woman of color. Sofia Vergara is a terrific comedienne and kills in the role, but the brunt of her jokes revolve around her flimsy command of the English language. Gloria’s B-story FOR AN ENTIRE EPISODE dealt with her use of malapropisms, like “doggy dog world” and “don’t give me an old tomato,” because being foreign is her whole purpose on the show. Oh, and having boobs.
Although Modern Family has gotten away with Charlie Chan-ing South American women (so fiery! yelling!) for three seasons, Two Broke Girls came under fire earlier this year for the same stuff. But the difference between the two is that Modern Family is racist like that friend you have who wears Native American prints from Urban Outfitters until you say something about it and then they apologize and never do it again. You know they mean well, and “flesh colored” band-aids provewhite privilege is hard to spot sometimes. However, Two Broke Girls is like your white gay friend who thinks he’s entitled to say whatever he pleases because he’s been oppressed, so he’s allowed to oppress other people and call it being an “equal opportunity offender.” He’s earned the right to be a racist, insensitive asshole, because I guess he asked Audre Lorde and she said it was okay?
For example, look at Michael Patrick King. For the queers in the audience, we know MPK as the man who brought us Sex and the City, a series notably gaycist with its Lena Dunham-esque exclusion of anyone not white, except for the groundbreaking depiction of Miranda’s sexy fling with a chocolatey black man. However, King recently upped the gaycist ante with Two Broke Girls, a show the New Yorker referred to as “so racist it is less offensive than baffling.” The show reduces black men to sweet ol’ jive-talkers, Eastern Europeans to crazed sex hounds and Asian Americans to Long Duk Dong and “Yellow Panic” stereotypes. On the latter, Andrew Ti of “Yo, Is That Racist?” notes, “It’s distressingly easy to imagine the writers sitting around and listing off every single ching-chong stereotype, ultimately deciding with some sorrow that a Fu Manchu mustache would be impractical for budget reasons.”
And when Michael Patrick King was asked about it a panel for Two Broke Girls earlier this year, was he like your friend who vowed never to shop at Urban Outfitters again? Nope. He was like your friend that then buys a bunch of Native American print underwear afterward and then dances half-naked on a coffee table bragging about how edgy he is — because he’s, like, pushing boundaries or whatever. In defense of being a racist douche, King eloquently summed up the problem with a heaping helping of white gay male privilege, “I’m gay! I’m putting in gay stereotypes every week! I don’t find it offensive, any of this. I find it comic to take everybody down, which is what we are doing.”
Into this controversy steps The New Normal, the new Ryan Murphy show about two gay men who decide to raise a baby together, a show that marries Murphy’s trademark tonal inconsistency “with more gay jokes and regular old racism than Gallagher’s stand-up act.” All of Murphy’s shows have huge problems, and Glee has faced heavy criticism for not only being super racist, but also for being super transphobic, which was recently kiiiind of rectified by introducing the character of Unique, a young trans* woman of color. However, as the Cracked article on the show argues, the real problem is that everyone is a “something” on the show, and all the characters conform to broad caricatures, “like the awkward Jew with the afro, the black girl who always sings the big gospel notes, the gay kid with the great fashion sense, the overachieving Asian [and] the fiery, underprivileged Latina.” Although you could argue that in high school, everyone conforms to a stereotype, Cracked‘s Ian Fortey notes the Michael Patrick King logic behind that rationalization: “Glee’s producers think that by shoving their parade of characters and their intense stereotypes in your face, rather than having them be subtle, it’s cool, because they’re acknowledged.”
Similarly, The New Normal announces its offensive stereotypes as if it were shouting them through one of Sue Sylvester’s bullhorns. TNN has already caught a lot of flack for its “lesbian problem,” as it reduces all lesbians to “ugly men” with “gingerbread man bodies,” but this is pretty much the tip of one big problematic, racist iceberg. In one greatmoment for the history of gay characters, main gay Bryan (Andrew Rannells) refers to vaginas as “tarantula faces,” with the implication that gay men think vaginas are icky and gross. Elsewhere, he prances around a lot, listens to Lady Gaga, talks about dressing his baby up in Marc Jacobs clothes and does lots of other stereotypically “gay things.” This is not progress. This is pretty much the same crap that shows like In Living Color (see: their “Men on Film” sketches) used to pull, except now the “Equal Opportunity Offenders” are on “our team” (aka. Team Queer). As a self-proclaimed “femme,” I know there’s nothing wrong with being effeminate, but nothing about Murphy’s characterization of femme males feels particularly nuanced.
The problem is that instead of writing actual characters, Murphy falls back on tired tropes, showing his writing hasn’t evolved out of high school cafeteria labels. On top of Bravo Gay Bryan and his Butch Gay partner (Justin Bartha, who gets to watch football and do “dude stuff”), we have a Precocious Child (Bebe Wood), a Single Mom With Big Dreams (Georgia King), a Sassy Black Woman (Nene Leakes) and a Homophobic, Racist Grandma (Ellen Barkin, who deserves so much better). Some of these stereotypes are harmless, but Leakes’ and Barkin’s characters make my brain hurt, as they seem to be taken from deleted scenes from Crash. Barkin’s Nana exists in some Paul Haggis-ian alternate universe where people can just shout racist invective all the time, in place of actual conversation. And in The New Normal, the people around them just shrug it off or laugh at them dismissively. Because old people are so old, amiright?
Nana has a lot of people to offend, and like Andrew Ti, I can picture her crossing off a Glenn-Beck-created checklist for every episode. Jews? Check. Gays? Check. African-Americans? DOUBLE CHECK. To give Nana a lot to complain about, Ryan Murphy casts Real Housewife Nene Leakes to be the embodiment of every single stereotype about black women this side of an Aunt Jemima bottle. Leakes plays Bryan’s assistant, and in her first scene, she discusses stealing her boss’ credit card to buy new shoes, ones (of course!) covered in rhinestone bling.
When’s she’s not stealing, Leakes has a constant “mhmm” expression on her face, as if she spontaneously developed a case of Lana Del Rey lips. She serves no other purpose on the show except to be loud and to and validate Bryan and David — in the same way that most TV shows and films use people of color solely as vehicles for white narratives. General, non-gay-specific racism is nothing new in the media. Non-whites are always relegated to supporting roles where they are acted and commented upon by the white characters (e.g. Bryan and Nana), but rarely get their own agency or the ability to write their own narratives. (Both of the creators of The New Normal are white.) After all the criticism The Help received for similar issues, I’m surprised this ever made it past NBC’s people. I know the struggling network is desperate for anyone to take it to the prom, and Ryan Murphy is SO HOT right now, but this is just pathetic.
All of this overt stereotyping makes it particularly hypocritical when Leakes calls out K-Mart Sue Sylvester for being racist, asking Nana to take her “dirty, racist mind back to the South.” I couldn’t believe that the pot dared to call the kettle African-American, until I realized that the problem was that Murphy and Ali Adler (his out lesbian co-creator) don’t see any problem with Leakes’ character. TV sitcom writers don’t necessarily have to care about white privilege or how stereotyping perpetuates a system of systemic injustice, as they are more concerned with putting on a show and getting viewers. Murphy and Adler will do whatever is necessary to get laughs, even if that means offending people, because pushing buttons is part of comedy! Haven’t you seenBrickleberry?
In response to that reasoning, Lindy West writes:
This fetishization of not censoring yourself, of being an ‘equal-opportunity offender,’ is bizarre and bad for comedy. When did ‘not censoring yourself’ become a good thing? We censor ourselves all the time, because we are not entitled, sociopathic fucks. Your girlfriend is censoring herself when she says she’s okay with you playing Xbox all day. In a way, comedy is censoring yourself–comedy is picking the right words to say to make people laugh. A comic who doesn’t censor himself is just a dude yelling. And being an ‘equal opportunity offender’–as in, ‘It’s okay, because Daniel Tosh makes fun of ALL people: women, men, AIDS victims, dead babies, gay guys, blah blah blah’–falls apart when you remember (as so many of us are forced to all the time) that all people are not in equal positions of power.
To Murphy and co., it’s not being racist, it’s being politically incorrect, which Debra Dickersonargues is often the same thing:
The rhetorical cul-de-sac where white hate went–in goes racism, out comes political incorrectness. Use of this phrase is a tactic designed to derail discourse by disguising racism as defiance of far-left, pseudo-Communist attempts at enforcing behavior and speech codes. However, vicious, brainless, knee-jerk, or crudely racist a sentiment may be, once it is repackaged as merely ‘un-PC’ it become heroic, brave, free-thinking, and best of all, victimized.
And that sense of victimization is exactly what makes the gaycism in The New Normal so troubling, because it makes the show feel entitled to being offensive. Shock humor is the only type of humor The New Normal knows, and it insists on shoving it down our throats, like when Nana thanks a young Asian girl for “helping build the railroads” and offhandedly remarks that “when [she] was in school, they learned about presidents that owned people like [Barack Obama].” Shows likeSouth Park and Louie do a good job of using racially charged and politically incorrect humor as a way of critiquing societal and systemic norms, rather than indirectly supporting that oppression through just mindlessly regurgitating stereotypes. In contrast, nothing about Nana’s statements subverts the status quo, and the laughter only derives from the fact that Nana is saying the things we aren’t supposed to or allowed to say. She’s just being “real” and “honest,” like a second-rate Archie Bunker.
However, in the case of Bunker, the jokes were on him, as the show served as a critique of the conservative ideologies that made him racist, and Bunker’s punchlines only served to show what a xenophobic jerk he was. The New Normal doesn’t do that, and in fact, they have Bryan and Nana bond over both being Asian racist, so everyone’s racist and it’s okay. Because Murphy doesn’t know when to quit, the show’s fourth episode, “Obama Mama,” has Bryan and David then reflect on their racism — when they realize that they have no black friends. Because I guess having black friends makes you not racist, they try to get some to fix the problem. Spoiler: They don’t actually make any. However, they are nice to an interracial family for approximately two seconds, which istotally the same thing as challenging societally constructed racial biases. As Barney taught us, fleeting recognition of existence = friendship = post-racial society. Racism solved. Not only does this skirting of the issue uphold the show’s racial status quo, but it also centers on a false notion: Mel Gibson starred in four Lethal Weapons with Danny Glover and look how he turned out.
Remember hipster racism? This is that turned up to 11, like Murphy throwing a big blackface partyon TV and saying its okay because it’s “ironic.” However, the biggest problem with pointing this out is that people often don’t realize that ironic racism is still just racism. And what actually makes the show’s racism so doubly troubling is that the act of being systemically oppressed should make people more aware of the ways in which they have the ability to marginalize others, because they have experienced the same thing themselves. The New Normal is even ABOUT that marginalization, specifically the discrimination Bryan and David (or “Bravid”) face for being two men who want to raise a child. Although the show is on the surface purely entertainment, Murphy has an explicitly political agenda, one he announces at almost every turn, the same way he did when he made bullying a major storyline in Season 2 of Glee. The message in TNN is that all families are normal, which (although problematic) comes from a good place and is necessary in a political climate where even some in the LGBTQ community, like Rupert Everett, think two men can’t raise a child together.
As the gay parenting is the central subject matter of the show (rather than a supporting storyline, like in Modern Family), The New Normal is (whether I like it or not) a landmark show, and how Murphy defines “the new normal” will matter to same-gender parents everywhere. This isn’t one of Murphy’s haunted house yarns; this is people’s actual lives that Murphy is representing. As Spider-Man’s uncle once said, with that “power comes responsibility,” and like David and Bryan, same-gender parents want their children to grow up in a better, more inclusive world for all people, no matter their color or preference. In the third episode where, after being gay bashed in an outlet mall, Bryan tells David he doesn’t want to raise a child in a world where people so openly discriminate against each other. If Bravid ever have that child, I only hope that Ryan Murphy heeds that wish. Their baby deserves better.
Note: An earlier version of this post was featured on In Our Words, a Chicago-based online salon covering all things queer, and was updated to take the newest episode into account. You can find the original here.
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